Hey folks, let me tell you straight up: this article is absolutely fxxking useless. It won't give you any meaningful or valuable info. It won't teach you shit, won’t help you dodge any bullshit traps, and sure as hell won’t tell you the "Top 10 Best" of anything.
I’m Vincent. The only reason I’m writing this is to share some of the most wtf-level posts I came across on Reddit. The main theme? Shit people have found in their cars that’s straight-up bizarre.
Why am I looking this shit up? Well, we’re currently working on some storage products for cars, and I’ve been scrolling Reddit like crazy for inspiration. Then it hit me: what kind of ridiculous crap do people lose in their cars? Holy shit, I wasn’t ready for the chaos I stumbled upon. Some of the finds were straight-up mind-blowing. Guns, weed, women’s panties, handcuffs, hidden microphones, fart sensors, two fxxking containers of live spiders, a truckload of adult toys, fake butts, and even a frontal hair toupee. And yeah, that’s just the “normal” stuff.
Why the fxxk is there so much lost shit in cars?
Let me hit you with a gem from an Infiniti owner (grifter91):
"Ever drop something between the seat and console? That spot is also known as the abyss. If you plan to retrieve anything in there, you will need to tie a rope around your waist and tie the other end to the steering wheel. Otherwise, it’s treasure for the next driver."
And now, let’s dive into the WTF Car Lost & Found Awards!
Fake butt.
Straight out the gate with this shit. Who the hell uses a fake butt, and why would it be left in a car? I just can’t wrap my head around this one.
Odell the cat.
So, this dude forgets to close his car window one night. The next morning, while reaching under the seat for his lighter, he finds his neighbor’s cat, Odell, sleeping under there. Like, wtf, Odell?
A human heart and a homemade voodoo doll.
This one’s a fxxing horror show. Some rental car employee finds a human heart wrapped in a white towel inside a returned vehicle. And oh, just casually in the trunk? A homemade voodoo doll with pins stuck all over it and a hole where the heart would be. WTF.
A 1995 Zippo commemorating the USS John F Kennedy.
Alright, this one’s not as freaky. Someone buys an old rusted-out BMW for shits and giggles, pulls out the carpets, and finds this mint-condition Zippo under the passenger seat. It’s been chilling there for over two decades. Low-key cool af.
Minnows.
This shit is straight out of a nightmare. Let me quote the poor bastard who lived it:
Moral of the story?
Do yourself a favor and get a car seat gap filler. I swear to fxxking God, don’t let anything drop into that black hole between your seat and console. Save yourself from smelling dead fish for weeks. Seriously.
If you’re too stubborn for a gap filler, here’s another approach from Michael J. McFadden:
“How can I retrieve an earring I dropped in the car?”
- Take your significant other (or just a good friend of the opposite sex if that’s more your vibe) to a drive-in movie.
- Have unprotected sex in the back seat.
- Keep at it until one of you gets pregnant.
- Nine months later, have a baby.
- Wait until the kid is around three years old and let them explore the car.
- Eventually, the little gremlin will find the earring and probably swallow it.
- Get a good strainer.
- You know the rest.
Problem solved, right?
